Oh, Lyall Cameron, he of the quick feet and middling market value currently, rather optimistically, pegged around €1.50m, or just about the equivalent of a decent semi-detached in Glasgow's more gracious suburbs – £1.3m, for those of you as averse to the Euro as Farage himself. Our pals over at Transfermarkt were kind enough to provide that little nugget of information. Cameron, born on the 10th of October, 2002 in a place no more or less barren than the beautiful blight of Scotland, stands at a rather average 1.8m, around 5ft 10in in real measurements, and tips the scales at a none too shabby 74kg (11 stone, 9lb for you fine folks). And, for some reason that eludes me, he chooses to sport the number 25 jersey.
At the tender age of 14, back in the halcyon days of 2017, he was whisked away to Dundee to flail his legs about as a trainee. He proved, like so many before him, to possess roughly the same consistency as our typical Scottish weather, knocking about with 26 appearances and eight goals in his debut season, then a rather ineffectual 32 appearances and five goals the following season, followed by another 33 appearances and nine goals - a sequence as remarkably repetitive as the chants from the North Stand.
Not content with his tours around Dundee and Peterhead, his whimsical performances led him, for undisclosed reasons, to Rangers in July 2025. However, his days in the light blue were to be as short lived as an ice-cube in a dram of single malt. In the few months he was there, he managed only six appearances in the first team.
In a move that nobody could have predicted, except anyone who'd watched his wayward performances at Rangers, he was unceremoniously shipped off to Aberdeen on loan in January 2026. The club seems to view him as the answer to a question nobody asked, with Cameron yet to step onto the pitch for a first team match.
To add insult to injury, he's been given one lone, token start in the Scottish Cup 2025-2026 with Aberdeen. Perhaps soon we'll see Cameron lighting up the pitches of the Premiership. Or perhaps, like so many other mid-range mediocrities, he'll lend his vanishingly scarce talents to a smaller club, far from the burdensome bustle and brutal expectations of the big leagues. Only time will tell.
